Stages Of A Relationship

A Quick Guide to the 3 Stages of a Relationship


The discernible reaction that one person has to another person’s magnetism and appearance can lead to the desire for more contact; the couple then embarks upon the 3 stages of a relationship that can determine if they are meant to be together for a lifetime.


It all begins with attraction.  Some spark, whether from external stimulation or internal depth, can ignite a common interest between two people to spend more time together to determine their compatibility.  It may be the pull of sexual appeal, it may be the draw of good looks, it could be a great sense of humor or even the appreciation of a deep intellect.  The actual spark varies from person to person, and may go unlit for years before finding that special person who shares the same vision.  When the two finally meet and know instinctively that they wish to pursue an association with each other, they will begin to walk down the paths of human bonding that have been travelled by many before them; the 3 stages of a relationship.


Although there are three basic stages, it is not as simple as just moving from step one to step two.  Instead of finishing one stage and leaving it completed behind them, many couples bounce back and forth between stages, sometimes returning to one several times, as they attempt to bond as a team.  There is no strict timetable, either; for some, the stages will be zipped through in lightening speed, while others need and dedicate more time to each.  Frustrating, wonderful, exciting and aggravating all at the same time, all relationships must endure these stages to appease the souls of those going through them.


Once the initial mutual reaction has brought two people together, the first stage is entered.  Romance is the most important of all stages, as it will continue throughout the relationship although in different forms; acting as the glue that will ultimately bond the couple.  Many couples celebrating their golden anniversaries will credit those romantic moments shared throughout the years as the one feature that helped them endure through the trying times.  In the beginning, romance blankets the annoying habits, the warts and the downsides.  It is a stage when all time is divulged into making the other person happy.  Lasting anywhere from few months to a couple of years, this stage eventually grows old and the inevitable warts begin to emerge.  Usually at this point, each member begins to try to change the other, which leads to next step in the 3 stages of a relationship.


Over time, the continual togetherness that was so romantic becomes constraining.  Both individuals feel the need for some freedom as those odd quirks that were once so endearing in the other person now just seem annoying.  Petty disagreements erupt as the couple experiences the “power struggle”.  They resist the feeling of being joined at the hip; sometimes, one member is ready before the other which can cause feelings of rejection.  In a marriage, this is the stage when divorce most often occurs when the couple cannot resolve their issues.  It should be a time when the couple comes to terms with each other’s individuality and accepts it.


The final stage occurs when the couple recognizes and embraces the differences in their partner.  They stop trying to change each other, accepting those things that make them each unique.  More than just accepting, the successful couple appreciates those differences.  Often, getting past the power struggle stage brings back the romance the couple experienced early on in the relationship.


The three stages of a relationship are all necessary steps toward a successful commitment between two people; one that will create a lifetime of happiness.