Are You Ready to be Living Together?
Most couples that last past the first couple of years will hit a point in their relationship where it is easier or more desirable try living together. Perhaps you spend all of your time at one home or the other, or perhaps you want a trial run of cohabitating before tying the knot. Living together is not always what you expect it to be, so here are a few things to consider before you take the plunge.
Living Together is Not Always a Party
Many couples find that the “honeymoon” phase of their relationship comes to an abrupt halt after they move in together. Prior to moving in with each other, dates were something to look forward to and get excited about. When you have your own home to return to, a night spent with your partner is a treat. Once you combine households, you lose the appeal of looking forward to your next date or phone call. Be certain that this excitement is what was keeping your relationship alive before you agree to the idea of living together.
Living Together is a Balancing Act
It can be difficult to manage your career, friends and a live in boyfriend or girlfriend. Many people find that their friendships suffer as a result of living together with your significant other. Unless you are fortunate enough to have the same friends, it can be challenging to find time to get away and do things without your partner. Establish guidelines before you begin living together to ensure that none of your friends are neglected.
Living Together is Not a Way to Fix a Broken Relationship
Many people mistakenly think that spending more time together will solve their problems. Living together seems like a natural solution to those that feel this way. The reality of the situation is that living together more often than not amplifies problems you may already have with your partner. Couples that argue a lot will find more reasons to fight when confined to a house together and sharing their personal space. Annoying little habits that you can ignore when you date will be much more noticeable when you live together.
Living Together is a Commitment
Seriously consider the terms of the lease before you decide that living together is the right choice to make. Aside from all emotional aspects of cohabitating, there are legal and financial obligations that have to be made. While living together is great way to see if you found your life long mate, if things go badly you will still have a lease to uphold, bills to pay, and purchases to divide just like you would in a marriage. Discuss this possibility openly with your partner so that neither of you is left holding the bill if things do not work out.
Living Together is a Compromise
To make living together work successfully, you have to be able to give and take in all aspects of life. Closet space, how to hang the toilet paper, and who pays the bills will all be things you must decide that you may have never thought twice about while living alone. The benefit to learning to compromise is that if things do work out well, your marriage will be stronger because of the growth compromising requires of each person.
Living Together is Not Always Bad
The vast majority of couples choose to live together before marriage. While the negative aspects must be considered, they should not overshadow the positive aspects. Living together means you are willing to be open and honest about the need to try things out. It shows responsibility and a commitment to the success of your relationship. When living together works out well, it can mean you have found a level of happiness you could never achieve on your own.