How To Deal With Harsh Insults
Dealing with harsh insults can certainly turn your day a little blue. No matter how hard you try to act completely unaffected by them, chances are, they are lingering in the back of your mind all day. Your self-esteem can become quite damaged, your feelings can get hurt and then you can turn frustrated or angry if you dwell on them.
The worst type of harsh insults are those one that are offered as a compliment that you and everybody else around can clearly see were meant to be completely rude. So how do you deal with these blows to your day when you are on the receiving end? If you are like most people, you probably even waste a good amount of time replaying the situation in your mind and thinking about what you should have said and how you wished that you had handled it.
Consider The Source Of The Insults
Most of the time, harsh insults are hurled by individuals who really should mean nothing to you at all and if you really look at the situation, you will wonder why they even bothered you. Could it be that this person feels inferior to you and making you feel bad is the only way that they can feel better? Maybe this person is competitive and sees you as a potential threat. When you really consider the source from where the insults came from, they often won't hurt nearly as much anymore.
Ignore The Ignore Rule
Although it is said that if you have nothing nice to say, to not say anything at all, this does not mean that you have to ignore the harsh insults completely. When you don't respond or react in any way at all, you are just allowing the hurt and anger to grow inside of you. By allowing someone to disrespect you and not deal with it, you are hurting your own self-esteem. Have enough respect for yourself to address the situation in a way that you will be proud of later.
Don't Lose Your Cool
While it is tempting to react right away, especially if you have more than a mild temper, all you will do is causes an unpleasant confrontation. You are much better to pause and pull yourself together and then ask why they would say such a thing. Quite often, the insulter is stumped when their victim behaves in such a mature manner.
Honesty Is The Best Policy
If there are other people around, ask the individual if you can talk to him or her in private. Eliminating the audience will often reduce the chance for additional harsh insults being tossed your way. If you honestly tell the person in a polite and sincere way that you do not appreciate what was said, there is a good chance that they will truly feel sorry. It is true that many bullies are hurtful to people because they are hurt themselves so being really honest will typically cause them to evaluate their behavior.
Some people do not even realize that their harsh insults are hurtful. They may think that they are being funny so unless you tell them how you feel, you cannot assume that they already know.
If you are standing there when other people are being insulted and laughed at, stand up for them. This speaks a lot about your character. You cannot laugh at someone else and then expect the tables to not turn on you at some point.
If you have any friends or family members that try to make you feel bad about yourself, you really need to evaluate that relationship. If you remove them from your life won't you feel happier? Aim to surround yourself with positive people rather than those who are only happy at the cost of others.