Coping With Rejection
Tips for Coping with Rejection
Whether you are an aspiring writer looking to get published, a musician trying to get signed, or on the lookout for a boyfriend or girlfriend, everyone has something in their life which may require skills for coping with rejection. Learning how to utilize these skills can make a huge difference in the amount of risks you take and how you handle each circumstance. Let’s take a look at the following tips for coping with rejection to help you overcome the disappointment of “no thank you” and move on to new possibilities.
When One Door Closes, Another One Opens
This is a saying that is often brushed off by many who are struggling to cope with rejection. It is easy to feel like it isn’t worth trying when you have heard more “no’s” than “yes’s”, but the truth is that the more you try, the better your chances of succeeding are. Persistence in whatever game you play, whether it means getting your ideas heard or dating, will increase the odds until you eventually get that approval. It is worth mentioning, however, that persistence does not necessarily increase your chances if you keep pushing someone to date you when they keep saying no, but in most other endeavors persistence will win out.
Don’t Put Your Eggs in One Basket
The worst thing you can do is to tie all of your affections and self worth to one thing, whether it be a relationship with a significant other, a job interview, etc. It is okay to get your hopes up a bit and think positively about something, be it a job interview, a relationship, or a contest, etc, but if you place all of your hopes and your value on one thing then you are practically setting yourself up to lose it all if things don’t pan out. It is important that you think positively yet plan ahead appropriately for rejection.
Let Go of Your Emotions
Whether you are a man or a woman, we are all susceptible to the burn that a rejection can cause. Rejection is completely mental and emotional, which is why it has such a profound effect on our self-esteem. There are certain coping mechanisms that the human body has built in to protect itself from becoming severely emotionally damaged. A good example would be crying. Although most of us try to suppress the instinct to cry, scream into a pillow, or punch a bed mattress, it is these type of coping mechanisms that allow us to release all of the emotional stress that rejection inevitably causes. Suppressing this instinct can lead one to mentally fester and stew over the incident until it becomes a much bigger issue than it truly is. It can also blind one to the possibilities that lie in the future. Try healthy exercises such as writing in a journal or having a good old cry. If you have a close friend or family member, try confiding in them about your feelings of rejection.
Remind Yourself of Your Accomplishments
A good way to come out of rejection mostly unscathed is to constantly remind yourself of your accomplishments. The majority of the reason why some of us suffer a severe self-confidence plunge after a rejection is because we place too much of our own self value on one other person’s decision. A great way to counter this is to remind yourself of your success before you go into a pursuit. After a rejection, take the time to reminisce about past successes and how accomplished you felt at the time. Tell yourself that if you can do it once, you can do it again. Evaluate any differences that may have occurred so that you can understand why the rejection occurred, if possible. Then tell yourself that in the future you will be able to avoid those mistakes.
It is not realistic to think that you will completely avoid any hurt feelings after a rejection, but learning to cope means trudging through the hardship and working towards a better future endeavor.